Star Trekkin' across the Galaxies!
by StudioGhibliGirl
Summary: Kirk and the crew, Romulan ale, nuclear reactors, and a whole lot of dorky shenanigans; what could go wrong?


Star Trekkin across the Galaxy!

Kirk X Spock, T, achohol, language

Captain James Tiberius Kirk was stumbling down the hall, quite disoriented, when he spotted a familiar face amongst the foot traffic. "Hey, Uhura!" he said and grabbed her elbow. She pulled back, causing him to trip and pin her against the corridor wall. Smart crew members had learned to bypass the antics of the Captain and quickly sped to their destinations, trying desperately to stay the hell out of it, whatever it was. "What is it this time Jim? Because you've either got a tribble in your pocket, or your very happy to see me!" Uhura said with a smug grin, pushing him away. Kirk blanched and stepped back. "I-I was just wondering if you might be able to tell me where Spock is, I need him to screw in the chair with!" Uhura stared. "WHAT?!" "Aw shoot! I-I mean screw the-HELP ME FIX THIS THING!...that came out horribly wrong..." He let out a hiccup. "Ugh...your drunk again, aren't you?" Uhura sighed. Kirk opened his mouth to deny the claim and another hiccup betrayed him. Uhura leaned in and sniffed his clothing, the scent of Romulan ale was evident. "That's just what we need, a drunk leader, ya know, they should start calling you Captain Morgan instead of Kirk...anyway, why not just get Scotty to help you? He's good with that stuff." "Oh yeah...where is he at, again?" Uhura face palmed and pointed down the right hallway. "I knew that!" Kirk said, then shuffled off to hassle Scotty.

After 3 wrong turns and almost an hour, the Captain waltzed into Scotty's little corner of the ship. He could hear the Scotsman's mad cackles as he worked on some new scientific endeavor.

"What 'tis it now, Jim?" Scotty grumbled as he worked on what looked to be a miniature nuclear reactor. The Captain eyed it skeptically. "You got a permit for that? Scotty leveled him a blank look and Kirk decided to drop it. "Hey, Scotty, I need you to help me fix my-" A loud thumping sound interrupted him, followed by muffled shouts. "What was that!?" Scotty sat up, seething. "SHADDUP YA BLOODY VULCAN!" he shouted, then remembered James was in the room. "Uh, there's a reasonable explanation for this, Jim, I swear!" "Start talking. Now!" Scotty gave him a guilty look. "Spock was here earlier today, on his rounds of the ship, and he found me side-project..." He gestured to the miniature reactor. "Was blabbering on about safety laws and Star Fleet regulations...he said if I didn't dispose of it he'd get me kicked off the bloody ship!" Scotty picked up the probably dangerous device and held it protectively, kicking empty Saurian brandy bottles out of his warpath. "I locked him up the maintenance closet, just to teach that no good alien bastard a lesson!" Scotty sighed. "I'll go let 'em out..." Side-stepping schematics diagrams and liquor bottles, Kirk followed Scotty to the back of the room, where a closet labeled "Janitorial supplies" was located. The Captain could hear a certain good-intentioned Vulcan thumping at the doors, to no avail. Scotty pressed a few numbers into the holo-pad and the white doors slid apart. There stood Spock, his face tinged green from all the effort and a death-glare on his face aimed straight at the Scotsman. Suddenly, James felt strong hands on his back as he was pushed into the tiny room, the doors hissing shut. "SCOTTY!" he cursed and banged on the entrance. "You'll never take me plutonium reactor, the both of you!" the man cackled and footsteps could be heard as he sped away. The Captain yelled a couple more times, but the truth was becoming painfully clear; they were trapped.

"Why did he do that?!" James asked as he slumped against the smooth doors. The closet was dim, halogen lights in each corner of the ceiling, and the shelves were lined with, you guessed it, cleaning implements. "The logical explanation, assumed because of the similar scent on both of your persons and previous experiences , is, that he is very, very intoxicated..." Both sat in silence for a few moments. "Where do you think he went?" Kirk asked, already impatient. "This would be his lunch break, so we can only imagine that he plans to let us out after, in roughly an hour and a half." Spock answered again, his voice devoid of all emotion as usual. The painful silence stretched on until Spock quietly spoke; "I believe I need to use the lavatory." Kirk paled. "Damnitt man!" Kirk stole Bones's line. "Use that Vulcan self discipline of yours and hold it!" "Technically, only 50% of my DNA is Vulcan, therefore-" The Captain cut him off with an irritated look. 'Oh, god,' he thought, 'This is going to be a long day...'


End file.
